Beauty – The Smith Farmhouse

Finding Rest

After my last post in April, I had every intention of becoming a more diligent blogger. Through sharing the lessons gained from the farm, I had hoped to encourage others and lift their spirits. There are gems and nuggets of insightful wisdom and joy gained through our daily experiences and I was looking forward to sharing them with anyone who wanted to follow the journey. The plan was to be disciplined and consistent but four months later, nothing. Not one blog post. It was NOT because the stream of inspiration dried up, so why then?

Well, to be real with you all, I started feeling more and more overwhelmed by the tsunami of fear and negativity on every forum. I thankfully made the decision to excuse myself from the conversations for awhile. During this silent season I took a retreat from attempting to make sense of things that, well to me, just don’t. Choosing not to formulate and express an opinion on pretty much everything, I went quiet , I listened, I watched and I rested. Of course the physical work didn’t stop… It actually CAN’T stop.. because you know, things would die!

On the contrary, my days have been filled with new life: baby goats, ducklings, goslings, chicks, baby bunnies, garden sprouts and fresh ideas. I’ve stayed busy chasing after my granddaughter, a vibrant toddler who helps me to see things in a renewed way. Watching her experience dandelion seeds blown into the wind and picking fresh peas from the garden for the first time is a delight. It has been a peaceful rest, both wonderful and at times painfully lonely. The friends who dropped by for a chat and some fresh eggs or the phone calls from loved ones with an encouraging word have been invaluable to me during this season. But, the release from the normal social demands has been especially refreshing and an unexpected gift in the midst of the uncertainty that surrounds our world today.

With a renewed mind I have had the time to evaluate my priorities and beliefs, to examine the basis of their foundations and assess their roles in the future. This opportunity to press pause, step back and take a deep breath has brought a more focused perspective for my life, purpose and the responsibilities I have to myself and to others. I so greatly desire that what I have gained in this season will be clearly reflected in the words and the stories in the pages of this humble website. I have many things on my heart and mind to share here, and I hope I can bring a little rest and perspective to your days going forward. Most importantly, whatever I write about, I will focus on the things that are pure and lovely, to deliver a good report that is uplifting to the heart.

For now, I leave you with this thought… What gives YOU more strength a rested body or a restful mind?

Summertime Blues and Greens

The Smith Farmhouse Experiment

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Well, hello again. I know, I know, it has been awhile. I have repeatedly reminded myself that I am supposed to be writing on a regular basis and staying on top of this blogging thing. The problem is this: I have a farm and it gets a little crazy around here. At present there are 35 ducks, 33 chickens, 12 goats, 3 geese, 3 rabbits, 2 cats and 1 dog who reside on our farm with us. These characters require a great deal of our time and attention. It’s a full time job year round, however summer is downright exhausting.

In the Pacific Northwest we have to make up for the short hours of daylight through the winter. We look forward to summer when the days are drier and the sunlight lasts much longer to get a large portion of farm work done. At the season’s peak the sun doesn’t set until almost 10pm and we make the most of our time planting, building, repairing and protecting it all from bugs, predators and the sometimes bi-polar weather conditions.

This year July was drizzly and cool with the occasional day or two of blaring heat scattered here and there. This inconsistency made gardening a little challenging to say the least. Each summer day offered a new opportunity of problems to solve, we were constantly battling slugs, aphids and birds to protect our herbs and veggies. While the pumpkin patch was hit hard and the cauliflower was a complete loss we still managed to end up with a thriving garden.

There was a point in the middle of this hectic season that I found myself getting discouraged and a little bummed out. The summertime blues as you will. The drizzly and cool days spoiled more than a few plans and put a damper on my mood. Then one day I pulled into our driveway after a trip to town and discovered a peacock in my front yard and my outlook began to change. This ostentatious bird was strutting around as if he owned the place. He spent a couple months flirting with the goats and chickens while displaying his glorious tail feathers as if he was doing us all a great favor. He honked and made loud, distressing calls that drove Farmdog crazy. I am also pretty sure he snipped off most of my sunflower shoots and bean sprouts but despite it all, I liked having him around. He seemed to be a living piece of art and we enjoyed his presence on our farm.

I don’t know where the peacock came from, it was a mystery we never solved. He graced our summer with his beauty and gave us a bouquet of his tail feathers to keep. He left just as abruptly as he arrived. It would be easy for me to be downhearted about his departure, the same way it was almost impossible to fight the discouragement from the lack of sunny days, my garden disappointments and the exhausting work load. “Almost impossible” and yet somewhere in the middle of it all I made a decision to fully embrace and enjoy each day for what it was. I challenged myself to notice and be grateful for all the good things around me.

It isn’t a simple feat to look past bug infested Brussels Sprouts to appreciate the thriving cucumbers and the abundant flower garden or embrace a difficult lesson from a hard loss as a valuable gift but it is a worthy endeavor. Applying a sunny outlook to the blueish hues of disappointment enables the ability to see the green of new life and growth happening within and all around us. This summer hasn’t been what I expected it to be, but I’m glad. I have gained so much more by choosing to see the difficulties and problems as an opportunity to grow stronger, deeper and more grateful each day.

The adventure isn’t reaching the end destination but in the journey to get there.

Dream Big

Katz N Smith

HarlequinSwan If you have read some of my posts or followed me on Instagram you will already know that I have quite a few ducks on our farm. I believe the count is currently at twenty-two. With this sizable flock, my summer was largely spent keeping plastic baby pools filled, dumped and filled again with clean water. If you don’t know, ducks are messy, really messy. Our resident chef, aka my loving husband calls them “cement makers”. They make mud, lots of mud and then stamp it down with their little webbed feet. Despite this fact, I love them…. I love the sounds they make, I love seeing the bonds they make with other ducks, but I mostly love watching them play in the water.

It only took a couple summer months of constant water refills before I knew we needed something big, something much larger than what we working with. So, we hopped in our small pick-up and headed to the feed store. (On a side note, for those of my friends who live in the city and don’t know where to get themselves a pitchfork or a cool pair of overalls, the feed store is the farmer’s Target or Walmart .) Shortly thereafter, we found ourselves with a three hundred gallon stock tank strapped in the back of our truck. The volume of the stock tank is greater than that of our truck bed so, I will let you imagine what we looked like driving home.

Our stock tank is awesome, it allows for more than one or two ducks to swim at the same time, which is a great plus if you enjoy watching ducks as much as I do. If for some strange reason we decide not to have ducks, (but why would we?) we can make ourselves one of those cool cowboy hot tubs you see all over Pinterest. That of course, would be after a major cleaning, because as I have stated before, ducks are messy! I was reminded of this fact the other day while I was performing my monthly draining of the duck tank. The faucet valve didn’t work and I had to use the shop vac to suck out the murky green water. After too many fill and dumps to count, I reached the bottom, a thick layer of muck and bloated eggs. What most people don’t know is that ducks, especially young ducks will often lay their eggs while walking about or even swimming. Filling and dumping the shop vac is unpleasant enough, but I seriously began to reconsider my decision to have ducks while sucking up their stinky sludge.

It is easy to forget in the difficult times why we do the work, why we push through the muck and mire, wear the bumps, bruises and blisters, just to go to bed at night exhausted, wake up in the morning and do it all over again. When I fill the tank with fresh clean, although somewhat sulphur smelling well water and the ducks begin to dive in and splash around with excitement, I remember why. It is in these moments I am filled with joy and inspiration. I watch my flock raising their wings as if they are majestic swans and recognize the wondrous beauty of this simple moment. With one captured second of complete bliss, I can creatively share my dream with others. When I do this, it grows and becomes even more than I could have ever imagined.

Dream big my friends, work hard and push through the difficulties to achieve it but, when you do, don’t forget to enjoy it. For in doing so, you will surely inspire others to do the same.

High Hopes

Smith Farmhouse Characters, Uncategorized

First of all…. How has it been two months since I have written a blog post? I literally gasped when I saw that my last post was June 25th. I remember that day clearly, I was so excited that I had finally figured out how to upload my children’s book and with sincere expectation believed that it would be a couple short weeks before I would get my proof in the mail and approve it for print. Oh, I have always been the optimist but my estimate of two weeks would actually be more like two months.

I didn’t take in to consideration that I would make mistakes, I learned that we are often blind to our own errors. I ended up going through the process four more times before getting it right. It has been a good thing for me in so many ways, I am learning to take things in stride and embrace the realization that taking the time to do things well is important. As much as I wanted to get my book finished by a certain date, I wanted it to be done excellent, even more. So, I learned to swallow my pride and embrace my mistakes as an opportunity to grow and move forward.

I also didn’t factor in just how exciting, emotional and exhausting July and August would be. Farm life has been so full of new births, building projects, blackberry bush removal and visitors. We started farm to table dinners and finished the second phase of our goat barn. Amid all the gains we have had loss too, we lost our first baby goat in August. The little doeling had a cleft pallette. It was heartbreaking. Even though we have her sister Millie, I often think of her tiny twin that slept in my lap and died in my arms. Even in sadness there is so much to be gained. Love and loss often come hand in hand, I am learning not to allow grief to keep me from moving forward and embracing the love and joy in front of me. Somedays that means bringing home free kittens when you have tears streaming down your face and you need to smile so your heart doesn’t break. It’s ok, it really is.

I have high hopes for the future, not because I expect that everything is always going to be rosy. I am optimistic because I know that I can find value in every circumstance. I can climb higher than life’s problems and find new perspective gained from all my past experiences. I have gained so much from pushing through and finishing my book, it was so much harder than I expected and even more rewarding when I finally approved it for print.

When life is hard, or you keep making mistakes, don’t let it break you. Use these opportunities to make you stronger, better equipped and just grow with it.

P.S. My book will be available on Amazon in about 3-5 working days from today… I am so excited to share it with you all, let me know what you think of it,if you choose to purchase it!!!

Petals and Thorns

The Smith Farmhouse Experiment

It’s May! Yay! Those April showers certainly have brought the flowers and with them the blackberry bushes. I have a love/hate relationship with those vines. Yes, they do provide the most wonderful berries in which I will gather and devour along my morning walk in the next few weeks. Those same vines are viciously cruel, leaving me looking as if I was dropped into a pit of wet and angry feral cats. It does not matter how careful you are, those beastly thorns will find the most vulnerable unprotected patch of skin to torture.

When we purchased our property two years ago it was wildly overgrown, there are still areas on our five acres that we have yet to set foot on. It’s been a battle with hedge clippers and a lawn mower but I am gaining ground. I am using all the tools I possess to claim my land and my future. Along with the multitude of scratches, cuts, and painful thorns embedded in my tender flesh are the lovely hidden surprises uncovered as I subdue my little plot of earth. Yesterday my prize was a tiny purple flower standing defiantly lovely in contrast to it’s prickly confinement. This kind of beauty is what compels me forward despite the pain I might endure.

Farmlife, as in all life is, is full of these moments where joy and pain walk hand in hand. Last month we watched as one egg out of twenty miraculously hatched after 46 days of not so patient watching on my behalf. I had finally given up and decided to discard the last two eggs from the nest when I heard peeping coming from one of the eggs. I rushed to replace the egg to the nest before it’s mama returned and the next morning I was rewarded with the smallest little fluff of yellow I had ever seen. Joy! My hope fulfilled! I made the decision to leave the duckling and entrust it to the faithful duck who had set there so long for this little lone survivor to hatch. I returned to find it’s tiny form cold and lifeless on the ground, it appeared to unsuccessfully follow it’s mother outside the shelter. Death and loss is always painful, even a tiny duckling not fully one day old can have an impact on one’s heart. Life can be brutal as well as beautiful.

It wasn’t even a full week later that another lone survivor duckling hatched , this time from our incubator. We had started with ten eggs but only four started developing. I had begun to lose hope when a mistake on our sensor placement caused the temperature to rise higher than it should. Against the odds, this little one made it and the joy of this triumph was made just a little sweeter in contrast to the dismay I felt earlier in the week. Trials, pain, disappointments and such are the black lines in a painting that define and enhance the colors of our life. Hope and patience to wait for beauty in the midst of pain and loss is the intrinsic nature of a farmer. It takes faith to place those costly, diligently thought out seeds in the ground and wait for the fruit of their labor. So many factors are out of our control and yet there is no victory in life without taking risk and doing the hard work. Our labor may be painful and the risk come with a cost but we will not gain anything of true value without it.

I may be tenderly typing this entry with sore, berry bush thrashed hands but; I do have a renewed passion and gratitude for my life and that my friends is worth it.